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It's been a little while
My last login was in December 2020, roughly 4 months ago. It feels like I've been away from this website for a much longer amount of time than that. Maybe it's because I spent so little time here when I popped in that I forgot it happened (which I did). In February, I drew a burger. My rusty brain figured out how to use the very easy tools to display it to the right. How neat. Considering my creativity is still shattered on the ground, I feel like I'm just walking on broken glass each time I go to draw. It hurts, and it gets worse when I keep trying to force myself to keep going. I haven't been able to write either, and that's despite making significant changes to progress the stories I have. I don't think I'll be posting frequently, not that anyone would think I would. I work too much, and I work myself to exhaustion 90% of the time. Why would I draw when I'm home from work when I could melt my brain watching criminal justice TV shows or just straight up pass out? If I do post
An update
It's obviously been very quiet on my little corner of the internet. I would have thought being quarantined/sick for a month and a half would let me be super creative. Nope I had my first day back at work, clear of illness. I had no idea just how much being isolated for so long had screwed with my mental health. Granted, I also isolated myself from a lot of my usual online methods of socialization. Barely talked to anyone other than my mom, which is my own fault. If I'm not looking at anything to remind me of things, I forget. This includes friends and family. (I have no idea why my sense of object permanence is destroyed.) I guess my point is that if you're in quarantine, don't shut off all routes of communication with people. After a while, I became convinced people wanted nothing to do with me since only one or two people actually reached out to me when I was forgetting the rest of the world existed. I know that's not true, but in quarantine, my mind did horrible things. If you
update, hiatus
Didn't really want to make a post like this, but here goes nothing. TL;DR: I'm going on indefinite hiatus. (I've never understood why the tl;dr is always placed at the end of posts) This post does turn into somewhat of a rant. You already know the gist, so don't feel like you have to read my ramblings. My activity on dA has a track record of being garbage, so this shouldn't be too much of a surprise. What's been going through my head is that there's nothing for me here on this website. I'm a joke of an artist at best; I don't draw or write anymore, so what's the point of being here? I have zero desire to log in more than once a week, if that, and my creativity is absolutely destroyed. Too many voices in the back of my mind repeating that what I create is worthless. Most of the voices aren't mine. I'm at a stage in life where I just want to start over with a clean slate. I want to start over without pressure of keeping up with past goals weighing me down. One of the things that's
Important Group Changes
Hello all! I just made a few announcements in the group's Discord server regarding the following changes that will be taking place ASAP. If you haven't already, all members MUST be part of the Discord server. Join here -> I've recently discovered that all group journals I post in Eclipse are also submitted to my personal journal/post portal. This is an issue! I can't figure out how to fix it or stop it from happening. To temporarily fix this issue, I will be moving all updates/posts/journals--pretty much anything that's written down and important--to the Google Site -> . This is something I've been wanting to avoid, but at the moment I don't have a choice. I will continue to post announcements in the Discord Server with direct links to any and all created pages. It is important that you are part of the server, and it's important that you allow notifications for the announcements channel. I've seen the notice that Groups will be getting changes as well, including some that make
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